How to Create Your Own Writer’s Retreat (At Home or on Your Next Vacay)

May 30

For the past couple years, Jenn and I have partnered with Maggie Langrick of Wonderwell Press to host The Big Leap, an 8-week book proposal development program that includes a 4-day luxury retreat for aspiring authors. After guiding many writers through this amazing whirlwind experience, I decided it was time to design a writer’s retreat for myself this summer, so I booked a last-minute 15-day cruise along the old spice trails of Asia from Singapore to Dubai, packed a few facemasks, my journals and pens, and added Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic to my Kindle.

If you’ve ever wanted to experience a writer’s retreat or have been to a few and want to take a stab at designing your own, here is your go-to guide (and you don’t even have to put on hard pants!)

Setting Up Your Retreat: Let’s Go Goblin Mode, but in Barbados Linen

What’s the point of a writer's retreat anyway, and why do we writers crave them?

Well, there is a ton to like about retreat life: the lavish and much-deserved “me time,” flowy PJ-like linen that is fully acceptable to wear in public, space to reflect and consider our life choices (should I pay my car insurance or buy my 200th book?), you name it. But I think the real luxury of a retreat is the act of committing to uninterrupted, dedicated time with our craft. It is like making New Year's Day happen on call: all the goals get reset, all the bad habits are put aside, procrastination becomes so last year, and after a few days, we remember how we were actually meant to be living our lives.

So in the same way, you might decide to be unapologetically self-indulgent and cut off all contact with the outside world. In “goblin mode,” the first thing you need to do is block off your calendar for 2–3 days and prepare a space or choose a destination that is distraction-free. (This goblin holiday will not include a side of bed-rotting, and it will require baths, but don’t worry, you won’t have to make your bed). This distraction-free zone could be a beautiful cabin in the woods, a rad spaceship-shaped Airbnb in the desert, a last-minute cruise cabin, or a simple staycation.

Whatever the case, create negative space by coolly telling your friends you’ll be “off the grid at a retreat over the weekend,” dropping the kids off with grandma, putting your phone in one of those cell-jail lockboxes (or on “do not disturb” mode), and turning off autoplay on your Netflix. If staying at home, get the laundry and chores out of the way, or put them on hold. One of the best parts about retreats—and my cruise, for that matter—is that you don’t have to worry about dirty clothes, cooking, or dishes! I had so much freedom on the cruise, I wrote for hours and still had time to go to an afternoon Zumba class. I intentionally chose not to buy the internet or cell service package, which meant I was basically off the grid every day we were sailing. I spent days at sea writing in the ship’s Irish pub, in the fully stocked library, and by the pool.

Now this might sound super obvious, but by forcing myself to have fewer distractions, I allowed myself time to write. And as I wrote a few hours a day, I remembered why I love writing so much. I reignited my passion and commitment to the craft, but more importantly, I began to believe I was a writer again. For these reasons alone, writing retreats are kind of priceless. Because half the time, the issue preventing our creative dreams from coming true is simply allowing ourselves the space to sit down and write.

Relax and Treat Yourself: The Three M’s of Retreat Life

No retreat is complete without one or more of the three M’s: Movement, Meditation, Massage. These retreat essentials may seem extravagant to some, or maybe too woo-woo for others, but the key here is choosing a few activities to help you relax, pull yourself out of your everyday routine, and give yourself the mental space to reconnect—with yourself. You have a lot of great ideas; you just might not be giving them any room to pipe up. This was my excuse to book an Ayurvedic massage in Cochin India, do sunrise yoga on the helicopter pad of the ship, and hit the gym between my all-too-frequent trips to the buffet counter (complete with unlimited ice cream cart!)

During our Big Leap retreats, we have done some amazing hikes, private yoga classes, and other movement activities, but it’s always a little different—catered to each group. One of my favorite signature meditations that Maggie leads our authors through is “calling in the reader.” It is a powerful visualization process where our authors are asked to close their eyes and imagine their book published, with a line of readers eagerly waiting to get a signed copy. Then they are asked to imagine their reader in great detail: what are their dreams, what are their struggles?

I can’t fully do this eye-opening practice justice in a short blog piece, but you can do your own version of this meditation by finding a quiet place to sit with a journal and taking 10–15 minutes to imagine your own book signing. What do you hope your readers will experience within your book? Do you want to entertain, help, or inspire? What kind of author do you want to be? What do you want people to say about your book? Write down whatever comes up for you.

Inspirational “Artist Dates” and Sizing Up the Competition

If you are like me, you can probably write a few hours before feeling tired or needing to take a mental break. Y’all are probably familiar with Julia Cameron’s The Artist's Way, a classic and required reading for all creatives. Anyway, in this creative bible, she suggests that you go on regular “artist dates” to spark inspiration and ignite your creative fire. During my cruise, I scheduled my artist dates on port days, from an elephant safari in Sri Lanka and sandboarding in Dubai, to visiting one of the wonders of the world, the Taj Mahal. Because I was working on travel essays, these excursions were the perfect way to refuel my writing and give me new material to write from. What artist date would you schedule for your retreat?

If you are doing a staycation, or will be near a town for your retreat, I highly recommend making one of your artist dates a visit to the closest bookstore. Not only is it incredibly inspiring to be among loved ones (books, of course), but it is also an opportunity to get to know the market and size up your competition.

Go to the place in your local bookstore where you think your book might be shelved and spend some real time getting to know that shelf. Study the most popular books. Which ones have multiple copies out? Those are probably selling well, so the bookseller has preemptively stocked extra copies. Which ones are faced out on the shelf? Those could either be bestsellers or books that aren’t getting enough traction, which a considerate employee is trying to draw attention to. Each book, bestseller or not, has something to teach you when you pay attention to what draws you to it or what makes you put it back on the shelf. What is working and what is not working for you? Treat yourself to one or two books that have similar themes to yours—for market research, of course!

Next, I know I said we were gonna do goblin mode in our chic linen, but a hugely valuable part of retreat life is sharing ideas with an invested group and hearing other authors share their own book ideas. We are pretty selective about who we invite to join us at our Big Leap retreats, because we want to create a safe and inspiring atmosphere for our authors. So we try to choose folks who are open to feedback, respectful and supportive of others' ideas, and uniquely talented and knowledgeable about their fields. Surrounding yourself with smart people elevates your thinking and your work; it’s science.

My cruise-ship version of this was talking with anyone willing to tell me about their travels. As it turned out, I had joined a larger cruise that was going around the world for nine months. I couldn’t have chosen a better group of people to surround myself with. For your writer's retreat, you can plan to do this with a friend, sign up for an online workshop, or join a local writer’s meet-up. Get curious, ask a lot of questions, and offer supportive and helpful feedback when asked. Hopefully, your writer’s group will respond in kind.

Celebrate Your Progress: You Are Ready to Write That Book!

Retreats are also often designed to create exponential progress in a short period of time. On the last night of our Big Leap retreats, we always make it a point to celebrate everything we have accomplished: nailing down a clear book concept, strong positioning, and a killer title (that’s a lot in just four days!) So at the end of your self-designed retreat, I encourage you to get a little glitzy and take yourself out to a nice dinner. Celebrate the commitment you’ve made to your book, be proud of your progress, and reflect on the joy of the process. You’ve taken the most important step there is—the first step.

If all of this sounds like too much to plan, but also the game-changing jumpstart you need to finally write that book, email me about joining our next Big Leap! The full program runs from August to September 2024, and the in-person VIP retreat dates are August 21–25. We’d love to see you in person and help get your book out into the world!